Toilet Technology Moves Forward
TECHNOLOGY - One might think that the technology of toilets had reached
its logical zenith -- but, not true! In this strikingly innovative
design, aimed strictly at women, American genius and innovation is once
again in evidence.
manufacturer of bathroom fixtures, American Standard, announced today
that it is rethinking its entire marketing strategy. "For far
too long, men have been the kings and tyrants of the toilet," said
a spokesperson for the company. "But, plainly, women piss,
too... and our new design reflects our deep and lasting concern for
their enjoyment of this universal function."
In a rare
parallel announcement from the White House, President George Bush issued
a proclamation that this month would henceforth be designated
"Women's Toilet Strategery Month".
of America," states Bush's proclamation, "have too long
suffered the abuse of male dominance of the toilet." Off the
record, however, White House aides indicated that Mr. Bush, who suffers
from chronic constipation, rarely lifts the seat, anyway.